Recently, my granddaughter and I were on our way to the theater to see the play Matilda. As we were driving through the neighborhood of her former best friend, my granddaughter informed me that her “BFF” lived there until she moved to another state.
My granddaughter became sad thinking about the loss of her friend, so to lighten the mood I asked “what does BFF mean?” She looked at me, made a face, and responded “Best Friend Forever, Grandma.”
For the next 15 minutes my granddaughter explained why her former friend was her BFF and the wonderful secrets they shared. While she was speaking, my thoughts drifted back to my childhood and my BFF’s. When I was in elementary and middle school, I had two BFF’s. We were inseparable.
Over the years, I have been blessed to meet many people, however only a few became my friends. Why? Because, when I meet new people, I hear my mother’s words of wisdom ringing in my ears. Growing up, my mother would remind us to be selective with my friends. My mother always told us, “the people you spend time with will determine your character.” Of course, being a teenager, I didn’t think she understood my friends.
Well, my mother may not have understood my friends, but she understood the importance of the inner circle. On numerous occasions she explained how important it was to spend time with like-minded individuals, who shared my goals. My mother would always close her lecture with the following question, “is this person helping you move towards, or away from your goals?”
My two BFF’s and I promised to be friends forever, however I moved away and we began to drift apart. When I returned to my hometown to go to college we reconnected, but it wasn’t the same. We were different people, with different goals, moving in different directions…
As a leader, I still follow my mother’s advice. I am very intentional about who is in my inner circle. My inner circle is composed of a small group of individuals who are liked-minded but challenge my status quo. They consistently encourage and add value to me. We are constantly growing and improving.
You are in the chair now, what qualities are you looking for from the individuals in your inner circle? If you have never answered that question, now is the time!
You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
– Jim Rhone
So, are you spending your time with two’s or ten’s?
While my mother never knew or met Jim Rhone, I know she would agree with what he said. The choice is yours.
Now that you are in the chair, who is in your inner circle?